Warm hands push aside several posing beauties, and lift Madison from the shelf.

"It's about time! I've been standing on that shelf for three years, wearing the same outfit. Yes!" Madison thinks as her dress is removed. "Finally! A new dress! What's this? NOOOO! Not the tissue paper! Anything but that!" Her tissue-wrapped form is carefully placed inside a box that is such a perfect fit, Madison is certain it must be a coffin. Claustrophobia sets in the instant the lid is closed.

"Buried alive? Cremated? Tossed into the landfill?" Her stark terror overwhelms her, causing her to black out. When she comes to, Madison is aware of being in a moving vehicle. Soon the vehicle stops, and she is carried a short distance. After being placed on a counter, she hears voices quoting numbers, a 'Thank you', then she is roughly tossed, landing hard.

"Hey! Ow! That hurt! At this rate, I won't be 'alive' to be buried alive!" An engine turns over, and grating gears make her shout, "Find 'em, don't grind 'em!" She is then thoroughly jostled, certain the driver, after disabling the shock absorbers, deliberately drives over every bump and pothole in the road. When the vehicle stops, Madison's 'coffin' is tossed from hand-to-hand, where it finally lands on a moving belt.

"Oh no! I'm going into the crematorium! Hey! No! Let me out of here!" The air becomes hot and stuffy, but no flames flicker aginst her 02 skin. She forgets all about being cremated as her eardrums are punctured by a deafening whine, a whine that grows louder and louder, then levels off to a constant hum. Her ears pop several times, and she feels like she's almost vertical for a moment, then lies flat once again. The air becomes cooler and cooler, until Madison is shivering, wearing only tissue paper. After many hours of the Arctic chill, she again moves off the horizontal for a few moments, ears popping, then she levels off once more. Another loud whine, then an equally loud rumbling, and the feeling of hard braking. She doesn't complain as much about being tossed around, because at least she is warmer. Another uncomfortable ride, more tossing, riding, tossing, and riding. Then finally, finally her casket is opened.

"Well, hello there!" says an unfamiliar face.

"Is this my new Reallady?" Madison thinks. She is finally dressed, but the garment is a grave disappointment. "Blue and white gingham? Are you kidding? What IS this shapeless frock? Oh! Jewelry!" She is even less enthused about the jewelry, a blue plastic bracelet secured with a snap, with something written in black letters. "uosipaW? Looks like some kind of alien symbols or something" She watches the alien read her chart. "I've been abducted by aliens for scientific experimentation!"

"Well, aren't you the lucky girl. You're here for the works!" says the alien. "New hair, new eyebrows and lashes, lips and cheeks." While Madison is wondering how the aliens are going to remove her lips and cheeks, her scalp begins to feel red-hot. "Hey! That's hot! Are you trying to cook me?" The torture device is turned off, but Madison feels no relief. Instead, she feels her scalp being peeled off. "EEEEEEOWIE! Scalping aliens?!" The heat source returns, this time concentrated on her unblinking

eyes. "Owowowowowowow!" Her imagination runs wild, anticipating her lips and cheeks will be next. Instead, she is scrubbed with a stiff brush. "Hey, I'd rather be at the Red Door! Your spa is strictly one star. No stars!"

Her ordeal begins to improve as she is dried with a soft cloth. A gentle hand repaints her lips and brows, and a fresh blush is added to her cheeks. New eyelashes and a new wig are carefully glued into place. "All done," says the alien.

Still wearing the tacky alien dress and the bracelet with the alien symbols, Madison is again wrapped in tissue, and endures her ordeal in reverse. This time when her coffin opens, she sees a familiar face.

"Welcome home, my beauty!" says Reallady. "Let's get you out of this hospital gown and into the dress I got you on eBay!" Satiny undergarments, silky tights, and a luxuriously plush velvet dress soon have Madison sighing with contentment. Brand new shoes are buckled on her feet, and she is returned to her shelf, only this time, she is positioned front and center. Reallady fusses with her for some time before finally going to bed. At last, Madison can share the horrifying details or her ordeal. Beth appears on the verge of tears, Beatriz wears an expression of disgust, and Madison wonders if Caitlin's, Jessica's and Rosemary's eyes are going to pop out of their sockets.

"No way," Allison smirks.

"What a liar," Mallory huffs.

"Such a drama queen," says Whitney, crossing her eyes.

Madison wears a look of triumph as she pulls up the sleeve of her new dress, revealing the alien bracelet hidden beneath. "Then what's this?"

Helen and Madalene grin, Kate giggles, and Tasha doubles over with laughter. Allison unsnaps the bracelet and replaces it upside- down. "Now what do you see?" Madison looks.

'Madison.'