21 REASONS WHY "STAR WARS" IS BETTER THAN "TITANIC"
  1. Titanic's big, but it does not have hyperdrive.
  2. Star Wars has way cooler action figure potential.
  3. Yoda could use The Force to lift the Titanic out of the water.
  4. Leia is a princess, a senator, a freedom fighter and Jedi material; but Rose is just marriage bait.
  5. Ewoks throw better parties than either first class or steerage.
  6. When flying towards the Titanic, Wedge can't say "Look at the size of that thing!" and really mean it.
  7. It would be much scarier to get chased around the boat by a raving madman with a lightsaber as opposed to a handgun.
  8. Titanic is egalitarian by portraying poor people as sympathetic characters. Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting bug eyed amphibians as Admirals.
  9. Said bug-eyed amphibious Admiral manages not to loose his ship.
  10. We know Cal is the bad guy because he sneers at his fiancee like property. We know Darth Vader is the bad guy because he strangles people and blows up their planets for fun.
  11. Yeah, Leo can dance but can he fly an X-wing???
  12. People have not lost their lives trying to re-create scenes from Star Wars on the bow of a cruise liner.
  13. Do you know what the Empire does to self procalimed "Kings of the World?"
  14. If Luke were handcuffed to a pipe below decks in a sinking ship, he would use The Force to get the key.
  15. Rose braves icy waters to rescue her man. Leia braves Jabba the Hut.
  16. Han Solo would've missed the damn iceberg.
  17. There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.
  18. "I'd rather be his whore than your wife" just doesn't have the same sting as "I'd rather kiss a Wookie."
  19. Han is frozen in carbonite and turned into a wall ornament. Leo simply freezes.
  20. We knew the boat was gonna sink. But who could've anticipated: "Luke... I am your father"?
  21. Two words: John Williams.

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