Military Speak.

As any ex-soldier will tell you, the strange things we heard from our fellow soldiers was the stuff of legend and would make any language scholar cringe in their grave. Because most of our corporals were Afrikaners so most of the stuff we heard was Afrikaans, here are a few classics for your enjoyment. Special thanks to everybody that has contributed to this page

  • "Plak jou poes op jou rug en vok of om die boom!!!" (Afr). (Trans: "Glue your vagina on your back and fuck off around the tree".)
  • "Dan vra my ma hoekom drink ek, al my bad water op? As ek vir haar vertel dan drink sy maar saam." (Afr) (Trans: "Then my mother asks me why am I drinking... all my bath water. When I tell her she has a drink too".)
  • "Jy is laer as slangkak op die seebodem" (Afr). (Trans: "You are lower than snake shit on the sea floor".)
  • "Jy is so stupid dat hulle jou nie eers in die artilerie will he nie!" (Afr) (Trans: "you are so stupid they don't even want you in the artillery".)
  • "Agter elke Bokkop is daar 'n vokop" (Afr) (Trans: "Behind every buckhead is a fuckhead" The infantry used the springbok as their beret badge. )
  • "Agter elke granaat is daar 'n egte soldaat" (Afr) (Trans: "Behind every grenade is a real soldier" The artillery had a flaming grenade as their beret badge. )
  • "Ek sal jou bal square trap, troep" (Afr) (Trans: I will your balls into a square shape.)
  • "Jy maak my ma se tiete taai" (Afr) (Trans: "You make my mothers tits tough".)
  • "Julle is so deurmekaar soos 'n verkleurmannetijie in a smarties boks!" (Afr) (Trans: You are as confused as a chameleon in a box of smarties".)
  • "Julle is so deurmekaar soos 'n bord kots!" (Afr) (Trans: You are as confused as a plate of vomit".)
  • "Maatjies kan nie die punch vat nie!" (Afr) (Trans: You buddies can't take the punch".)
  • "Dis uit soos boknaai!" (Afr) (Trans: "It's as taboo as screwing a goat".)
  • "Jy sal drolle dikker as jou nek kak, verstaan jy my?" (Afr) (Trans: "You will shit drols thicker than your neck, do you understand me?")
  • "Jy kan my naai as ek weet!" (Afr) (Trans: "If I knew you could have sex with me!")
  • "Julle maatjies skuld my een." (Afr) (Trans: "You guys owe me one.")
  • "Jy klink soos 'n kombuis" (Afr) (Trans: "you sound like a kitchen") Usually an outgoing patrol would jump up and down before leaving to hear if there were any rattles or loose squeaks coming from webbing and equipment. If there was inevitably it would draw a comment similar to this.

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